Spontaneous

Why is it
men have to be spontaneous?

I make dinner at 6 every evening.
I get to work on time.
I take a pill every morning.
Why can't a man
show up in the bedroom, say,
ready-for-action at 9:30 pm. I can wear
my ready-for-action clothes. You know
those shoes that have never left
the house? I'll wear those shoes.

You need a story? "I can tell
you a story that'll make you
cry. Ay." Co-ed, camp counselor,
car wash maintenance chick,
2 on 1, 2 on 2, I got
all the word porn you need
'cause with a man, you know
it doesn't have to be good,
it doesn't have to be true,
it doesn't even have to be something you
especially like. It can be pulp
porn. Pulp word porn. Pulp magazine
sci-fi side show take it all off
are you my little girl porn.

And yet, when I'm hungry, I
mean really really hungry,
there's a different goal.
My goal is to be
incapable of speech. I don't
mean incapable
of saying sarsaparilla
or phantasmagorical. I
mean incapable of saying
"cat." Make my mind
a purple muscle moving
with no story. Hum.
Flesh. Circular. Ay.

But if you
need that story, I mean
really, really need that story, the one
with the braided hair, twin beds, blue
morning, who's on top?
I'll tell you that story. That is,
provided you show up on time.
My place. 9:30 sharp.

If you don't need
that story, if the shoes
come off, stay on, get raised,
it doesn't matter, we
don't care -- if you don't need
to picture something else, somewhere else,
someone else, I'll meet you in that
room. We'll put

the words outside the door, with the milk
bottles and chocolate and mortgages
and costumes. We'll put them outside
with date books and schedules
and anytime will be a good time,

morning in the parking garage,
afternoon on campus, nighttime in
the movie theater. That is to say,

everywhere and anywhere can be
that room, and we can be
truly

spontaneous.

Copyright Louise Robertson